Friday, 30 November 2012

Traffic (Amendment) bill 2012

This is how some parts of the act are being interpreted in Jukistopia.

Everyone who has been to a driving school and a driving test, in Nairobi, should not be surprised that there are so many accidents on Kenyan roads. For example, for class BCE, the training involves,
weka number mbili (engage second gear), take off, engage third gear, let the truck drift for five to eight minutes. Do this routine every day for 10 days and you are good to go.
At the testing it goes something like, 
“ondoa gari,..... weka number number tatu,.... simamisha, ngojea nyuma - umepita kijana sasa nenda ukajifundishe ghari. Negst! (take off, change to third and drive 30 metres, stop, you have passed, now go learn how to drive)
All police officers, I suppose AP too will be mandated to enforce traffic rules. Meaning no more looking out for the white cap before executing a maneuver that you wouldn't approve of.

I would have thought road transport is under Ministry of transport. So why should plates belong to KRA

..but can be valid regarding another?

If the vehicle is "on the rocks" you have to return the plates, or keeping paying insurance for the scrap, and I guess there will be a fee for returning them, in the prescribed manner, and a fee for redeeming the plates.
However surviving the the eight hours queue, extremely rude guards and clerks in the KRA banking hall will be the major challenge.

Attempting to drive! Read that as entering a vehicle while appearing to be from bar. Mark you, now it is all police watching, any cop without unga will only need to wait at a parking lot outside a place where there are noisy people inside and cars parked outside, and soon there will be sot attempting.

The key words to note here are NOT LESS THAN OR BOTH.
 I know you hate them and you feel like you could shoot one or two. But hey, half a million plus ten years in the can is a bit stip. You may not realise it, but the oaf is your brother, cousin, father or whatever. Which means as he cools porridge at Kodiaga, you will be taking care of his children.
and if you sincerely think it does not concern you, check what it say in number two.
So next time you have a wedding or any function where you are serving liquor, keep an eye on the hire driver.His cross is yours to carry.
And ff you run a bar, ask all patrons to produce their job ID.

Driving on the pavement is now allowed!

  1. You can drive through Agakhan walk as long as you are not avoiding traffic jam.
  2. If there is a traffic jam, and you go into a petrol station, you must go back the way you went in.

Am still trying to figure out what this means. If you find out please let me know. But I suspect a driver splashed water on someone who was making the rule.

Taxi cabs required to have a conductor

Even if you drive your own PSV, you must employ a driver and a conductor. A taxi cab or a tour van is a PSV therefore, there dare own one without employing a driver and a conductor too.

Does not matter what the facts are. Get them by any means.

Never assume that the waving fellow clad in a red shuka in the bush is greeting you. If he as much as makes any gesture, STOP!

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